OK, I am about to share more than I would usually but I need the distraction. Just warning you.
Tomorrow I am having a colonoscopy. Yep, one of those lovelies. So yesterday I had to not eat fruit, fibre, veggies, red meat etc. I could have low fat dairy and lean white meat. That's alright. I can cope.
Today, I am allowed no solids, no milk products, no food! I am allowed clear liquids eg. clear juices, jelly, strained chicken noodle soup. That sort of thing. Holy Crap! (Get it?) Food is so-o-o important to me. This is killing me. (Slight exaggeration, only slight).
This afternoon I have to consume some stuff, some dosed water, some chemical that will empty my bowel like a good dose of salmonella poisoning, like an Enyo cloth for the inside, like a fire hose has been shoved down my throat and will straighten out my small and large intestines. (Again, I don't exaggerate greatly). Holy, holy CRAP!
Help.
Tomorrow, I have to have nothing four hours before procedure. I think I have said it all. My life is HELL. Hell I tell you. Of course, this comes from a spoilt woman who considers food to be the staple of her life (funny about that).
I will survive. I am a survivor. I didn't say I wasn't a whinger. I also didn't say I don't feel sorry for myself. I certainly would never say I enjoy starving to death. But I do like a good exaggeration.
1 comment:
Still hungry. Just saying.
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